I’ve had this conversation a half-dozen times in the last month. So, definitively (for the moment) here is my list of dealbreakers.
Vegan: I can’t date someone who takes offense at my dietary choices. Also, I can’t deal with people who think I’m a monster for not caring about animal rights. People who don’t eat meat because they consider it a waste of energy / resources are still cool.
Devoutly Religious: I’m a raging atheist. I respect that people can believe whatever they want, but I have some trouble dealing with things I think are illogical, in my personal life.
Doesn’t Read: This should be obvious. People who don’t read are boring. The novel is the most developed cultural product in our civilisation. There’s infinite amounts to read online. If I can have a day’s worth of conversation without you mentioning something you’ve read, dealbreaker.
Cat Owner: Cats cause me to die (asthma), or just stop being able to see or breathe (allergies). I’ve tried breaking this rule in the past, to much success. But dude, I like being able to see and breathe.
Can’t / Didn’t Commit to Education: I can deal with someone deciding not to go to college or university, we don’t all have the same path. Same deal with leaving early to pursue a different path, or with switching majors. But stopping just short (less than a year left) or just dropping out? I won’t affect your bottom-line that much, how am I supposed to believe you’ll commit to me? (Recovering romantic, here.)
Doesn’t Like My Friends: This is straight-forward. My friends are awesome. Like, seriously awesome. You don’t need to LOVE them, but you have to be willing to spend time with them.
Doesn’t Care About Appearances: Well, everyone else does.
Cares Too Much About Appearances: Sometimes other people suck, ignoring their opinions is an option.
Doesn’t Like Cities: I feel more at home in a city I don’t know, than I do in the suburb I’ve lived in for my whole life.
Doesn’t Like Me Having Female Friends: I like girls, they make some of the best friends. Some of them will hug me, or kiss me on the cheek, or let me sleep on their couch because I still live in suburbia. None of this makes me a bad guy. A little insecurity that reminds me you like me? I’m game. Telling me who I can and can’t spend time with? Dealbreaker.
Expect additions.
